I’m a child of the 70’s and my parents were well into the Fruity Lexia boxed wine and a good salmon mousse. They paired it with oranges stuck with cheese cubes and green pickled onions, fondue and sometimes a good ham steak with pineapple and a cherry. These were good times. Happy times.
I grew up never giving a sideways glance to the famous perforated hole where the spout peeks out and dispenses what can only be described as piss on steroids. It wasn’t until later in life that I discovered bottled wine and became a bit of a goon sack hater.
Some of the parties I went to as a teenager were frequented by cunning law-breakers who would insert a half-empty bladder into their hoodie sleeve and sip it on the sly out of their wrist hole. Goon of Fortune was played. Because Straya. Afterwards, one would enjoy a nice nap using the empty silver bladder blown up as a pillow.
But a new player on the market, Tote Wines, is changing things up in a major way. Their new take on the beloved goon sack, takes wine that doesn’t come in a bottle to a whole new level.
“Whilst I still think boxed claret is lyfe, I will totes give this a go. I need to move with the times.” – Rico, Flawless Vision
Why do we need this?
Imagine carrying two bottles of wine in your picnic basket or camping esky. It’s really fucking heavy. They break, they tip over, and are annoying to dispose of.
Each of these pouches holds 1.5 litres of premium wine available on tap at a fraction of the weight. And even better still, once opened, the wine stays fresh for up to one month. So in the rare instance you actually just want a single glass of wine but don’t want to open a whole bottle, you can enjoy a tasty drop from the Eden or Barossa Valley and there is no wastage.
AND, no more waiting hours or wrapping up wine bottles in wet paper towels to get it to chill faster, one of these bad boys can chill down to drinking temperature in just 15 minutes. Adding valuable quaffing time to your event.
But is it vegan?
I’m glad you asked! The answer is yes, but you can consult the Q&A section of the website for more detailed info.
What about the carbon footprint?
To put that into plain, Green speak: a single truckload of flat, empty Tote Wines pouches is the equivalent of 14 truckloads of empty glass bottles. If you simply consider the carbon emissions produced by the transport industry alone, Tote Wines pouches are a step toward a more sustainable and responsible future for OUR environment and a step in the right direction for the Australian wine industry.
And does it taste like piss on steroids?
I tried both the Shiraz and the Sauvignon Blanc and was impressed. While the Sav Blanc had less of a sweetness than I was expecting, it was fresh and zingy and absolutely passed the fresh test as I drunk it over a couple of weeks. In fact, I think it even tasted better after a week. Find a bottle of white that does that!
The Shiraz I think is a game changer. This is not going to replace your finer bottles of wine, and it’s not meant to. But a nice Barossa drop on tap with the unbelievable convenience of a pouch and way less weight than a bottle? Yes. For camping and picnics, it makes a hellava lot of sense.
The only downside I can see is that you can’t use it as a camping pillow.
Love, FK xx
AND for a chance to win a 2 pack of Tote Wines, just comment on this post saying why you need classy goon sacks in your life. And “like” the Tote Wines Facebook page to qualify.
A winner will be selected on Wednesday 25th Oct at 7pm EDT
Click the logo below to SHOP A DROP
**Full disclosure. Tote wines sent me some pouches for the purpose of this review. I also receive a small commission from sales that come from this blog, that comes at NO cost to you.